Lotto-big bucks-ka ching…what would you do?

As I’m sitting here right now the powerball is valued at $80 million dollars. I realize by the time I finished that sentence it probably went up significantly. $80 million. Pretty low as far as lottery standards. Low….when on earth did this life get to be at a place where $80,000,000 is not very much? Sad but true. Every day is a new opportunity to want more, like nothing really ever is enough. I’ve always wondered to myself why they don’t give 80 people a million dollars or heck even give 800 people $100,000? I don’t know about you but $100,000 would change my life! Not drastically….but nicely. But no, people will continue to play until it builds up to be hundreds of millions of dollars where one “lucky” soul will cash in on some of the biggest money ever, and their life will be “soooooo good.” Or will it?

See, my husband and I don’t play the lottery. I’m not saying we never have. It was never a problem for us or something we felt we had to do. My first experience with gambling was as a waitress at the cafe my mom owned where I would shake 6-5-4 with the regulars. Nice way to put a little extra cash in my pocket once in a while. However I knew when to stop because at that time I was a teenager and every penny was important to me. I had to save for those super expensive jeans that already had holes in them because my mom refused to pay for them for me. Her theory was if I wanted to spend money foolishly on holy jeans I was paying for them-or at least most of them. I also needed to be frugal with my tips because I needed that $1.06 every other day to buy (secret) cigarettes. Haha! Back in the day-cigarettes were so cheap! I don’t smoke anymore-who can hardly afford to?

I suppose my next experience with gambling was when I turned 18 and could finally go to the casino. My mom took me. She gave me $20. I ended up making $200. I truly believe the first time you go to a casino that the casino spies know it and allow you that win, to try to hook you. Like wow, that was easy im going back tomorrow! Psssht. Because truth be told, I’ve never come out ahead again…(in the whole 2-3 more times I’ve actually been there) I used my money wisely though-haha! I bought $200 worth of slim fast meals. Because I was sooooo fat-all 130 lbs of my 5 foot 8 inch body. Genius-😒

Over the years I dabbled here and there. On our wedding anniversary my hubby and I stayed at a bed and breakfast where there was a big casino just down the road. What the heck-lets go. We each took $20-(big spenders I know)…mine was gone in a blink of the eye. Once Mark got a bit ahead he took the $20 he started with and put in his pocket and just played with his winnings. I kept dipping into his coin tray-clearly his money was luckier than mine had been. He had been playing max coins(3 each time) and as I dipped in the last time I left him with only 2. Here goes. He hit! Sad part is if I hadn’t left him one coin short he REALLY would have hit! Good news-he made enough money to pay for our entire trip-gas, b&b stay, dinner, the works!

Marks parents were not gamblers but enjoyed going to our local casino for their delish buffets. His dad would hand us a roll of quarters each to put in machines while we waited in the long line to eat. Another ploy the money grubbers do- let’s put machines RIGHT where they stand in line for the AMAZINGLY DELICIOUS food we serve so they are tempted, tempted , tempted! Mark would always just stick the quarters right in his pocket stating he is leaving with more than he came with. I, on the other hand always thought, what if? Why not? Free money. Nothing to lose. Nothing to lose but ten bucks! Lessons learned-or not.

I purchased a few crossword puzzle scratch offs because I figure if I’m gonna spend $3 im gonna have to work for that win. Once I got my $3 back. Once.

Next comes the day I’m going to buy a powerball ticket. I didn’t even know how to buy one! The lady says “You want a quick pick?” A what? I told her I’ve never bought one and that she was speaking chinese as far as I was concerned. The look of amazement for seeing someone who has NEVER bought a powerball ticket! I actually prayed…to God….that if I could only win He could have the utmost faith that I would go great things with it! Now seriously people, when God tells us to take care of what we are given, to use our time and even resources wisely, how could I even THINK He would bless me with a win? But I did think He would!

See, Mark and I have this dream…of winning big 🎉💲💲💲💲💲🎉 and truly doing something amazing! We talked about how fun it would be to just go to a bank and ask to see people’s debt-and just pick some random friends/family and just pay it! I know I know with privacy rules they’d never let us-but hey I bet money talks! 😉 my heart pounds hard even now just thinking about what a rush that would be to anonymously change someone’s life by cancelling their debt! All the friends we’ve met along the way who’ve wanted to do this or that -REALLY GOOD AMAZING THINGS-if only they could afford to. This set of friends would have their little bunkhouse cabins to care for troubled teen boys-they’d have new windows in their so-called “mushroom filled house”. …( if you’re reading this you know who you are! I’m just not going to try to explain the mushrooms here! It’s NOT DRUGS!!!! Bahaha ) My kids would no longer struggle with day to days, even though it’s ok and building character in them. My son would have all his torn up worn out body parts (the ones that are only 20 years old) fixed with not a care in the world on how to pay his deductible or cover his bills while healing-he’d be doing it from his home in the country in the exact place he wants to be. My daughter would be able to set her pregnant little bare feet on her front porch drinking sweet tea with a homemade pie in the window because she just belongs in the country. My Grandma would not have a care in the world as to having a beautiful nice place to stay if my Grandpa happens to go before her. My mom would truly be able to retire-completely and do whatever she felt like, and I don’t mean get a part time job, so she wasn’t stuck in the house all day every day. The waitress who did such a great job would find THEE biggest tip on our receipt because that’s not an easy job and she did it with the best attitude! The mom in the grocery store who looks like she’s ready to sit down in the toilet paper aisle and cry-I would follow her and pay her bill, then toss a little more her way for a sitter and a date with a masseuse. Just random stuff….see a need-take care of it! Of course Matk and I would have to discuss this all and he would add to what I’ve already said and there’d be so much more! Aaaghhh! I just would love it! Makes me wanna go buy a powerball!😂😂😂 I’m not kiddin when I say God knows my heart-he knows I’m not lying about this! I’d do amazing things! I’d…Do…Amazing..Things!

In the meantime, I will continue to do what I can, when I can, with what I have. What would YOU do?



🎶Living on the inside roaring like a lion-Gods not dead🎶

This is my Saturday-


Well, yes I’m a day late & a dollar short but I am  FINALLY watching the movie God’s Not Dead. It’s that kind of day! Cozying up on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, hubby by my side. To any who haven’t seen it, I highly recommend it!

This is movie made me think of different things on soooo many levels. A question I’ve always had and even struggled with at times is the same question as a man in this movie. He sits visiting his mother in a nursing home and is asking her why she is in the situation she is in…that she is the nicest lady to walk the earth, prayed and was faithful her entire life and now has dementia….and he is quite opposite, and “seems” to have the world by the balls. I’ve struggled with a similar question throughout different times in my life.

I used to work for a man who I claimed to be the spawn of satan himself. Despite the fact that he became a horrible person, cheated on his wife, was arrogant and prideful, was an all together dirty player he kept climbing the ladder, being promoted, making more money, seemed to be getting  more blessed as each day passed. He KNEW the truth, he KNEW God at one point in his life very well. Something along the way changed him and he , the once born again Christian, self declared he knew he was going to hell and that was fine…that was the way it was. And was OKAY with it! When I, a “fellow” Christian called him out on his bull(as we are called to do) the tables turned and all of a sudden *I* was the bad one… People turned on ME…I became the crazy one who had somehow “stepped over the line”. Why….why does this happen? Like the rich get richer, the poor get poorer, the evil people in this world seem to prosper while the ones who try to do right seems to get shoved aside. Why- had been my question. In this movie, the mother with dementia tells her son that “Sometimes the devil allows people a life free of trouble cause he doesn’t want them turning to God”. Interesting. The devil sure does want to hold on to as many who will follow him, making it easy to stay on the low road… I’m sure that the devil tries to keep some people away from God because he knows that as powerful as they can be as creeps they could also be as powerful to the good. Hmmm….


I always find find it interesting that people(even myself) continually question God. Question things/circumstances in their life. Why am I stuck in this job, why won’t my house sell, why did this happen to me, why am I stuck here, why did my relationship fail, why is this person not in my life anymore, why is this person now IN my life,  why this, why that, why, why, why? Its easier for me to GIVE this advice than to take it, but I DO believe it and every single time I question things and look back it makes sense. I wholeheartedly believe everything happens for a reason, and sometimes we never find out that reason, but God knows all! ALL! He knows where you’ve come from, He knows where you’re headed. Sometimes things don’t work according to our plans because God has a different one. A better one. Sometimes this thing called “divine intervention” happens. God sees what’s ahead and if it’s a train wreck then He sometimes casually pulls the lever and changes our course…. Switches us to a different set of tracks…puts us back on the right path. We must trust the process because His plan is soooo much better than ours!


I give lots of credit to the student in this movie who, without fail stood up for what he believed in and didn’t count the cost. He KNEW that God had his back and had a divine plan… As long as he was faithful to what he believed to be true. Matthew 10:33–“Whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven. ” There was no way this kid was gonna deny his beliefs or his God.  Is it easy to do what’s right all the time? Heck no!  But it’s great to know that I serve a loving God who knows every fiber of my being and still loves me….and still gives me those little nudges pushing me in the right direction, and when I choose the wrong direction He gently sets me back on track ready for the next life lesson. In the lyrics of the Newsboys- 🎶My Gods not dead, He’s surely alive….living on the inside…🎶

Roaring like a lion….



Life’s Blessings

Today (I guess it was yesterday-didn’t realize that it’s 1:50 a.m right now) I had the privilege and honor to go with my daughter and son in law to their ultrasound appointment. This was the one where they would get to find out the sex of the baby. I was asked/allowed to come as long as I didn’t peek at the screen when they were in that area. How I wanted to peek! It would have been so easy to just sneak a peek through my fingers! But I looked at my daughter and she was zoned in on me like a hawk! She did the “pointy fingers from her eyes to mine” thing saying “I’m watching you!” They weren’t going to find out at the dr either. They wanted the results sealed for them to enjoy the special moment alone together in the privacy of their own home. How special! So many things are made to be productions nowadays, how special for them to truly make it about just them.


She wanted both Mark and I to come and be able to have dinner with them that night and get the big reveal but Mark was tied up with work and not able to come. So the plan was that they would come up to our house next weekend to tell us. That plan did not last long. She was way too excited and couldn’t wait.

While I was at my sons house she called wanting to know when I’d be home because she wanted to FaceTime with her dad and I tonight. I was helping my son with his taxes so I told her when I was done I had to stop at walmart and would be on my way home. She basically told me to hurry up.

I had spent the afternoon at my sons house with his girlfriend playing with their new puppy. Oh…my….lanta….I am in love! What a sweet, cute, cuddly, freaking adorable little pup! She truly brings so much joy to the two of them! She came to them at just the right time! What a blessing! Of course I had a few more goodies for her-a pink camo collar and a pink camo mossy oak squeaky duck. Spoiled! (That’s ok)


I came away from today feeling extremely blessed that I have the kind of life and time right now that I’m able to pick up and just go…that I’m able to make it for special, important events and also just fun outings for the heck of it. To see the closeness of my kids with their loves. To watch my son in law tear up at the sight of his baby doing flips inside his wife….to see her look up at him and smile the most genuine smile…to see my son come home from work and call his girlfriend over to sit on his lap and see how much he cares…Its times like this when all the cares of the world fade away…I simply cannot wait to meet my little grandbaby! By the way…

It’s a boy ! 💙  ☺️🎉😘